Asking for help is not my forte. When it comes to my job (both Cabinet of Curiosities and stay-at-home Mom) I feel like I shouldn’t inconvenience anyone or else, what? I don’t deserve to work? I shouldn’t have any of my own interests? Written out in black and white it is pretty ridiculous but that’s how I feel most days.
I was able to squeak by with that attitude when I just had one kiddo at home (especially once he started preschool). Once that baby came along that got unsustainable really fast. I was trying to workshop plan as I nursed, stack shaky Jenga towers of phone calls and appointments when they would (supposedly) be sleeping and staying up later then I intended to.
This morning, after my 7:30am dentist appointment (so no one was late for work/school) I was facing down the prospect of waking the baby so I could get the older one to preschool and wondering how I’d get anything done after canceling the rest of her morning nap.
“Call (our neighbor)” my husband insisted. “Ask if he can ride to school with her.” I instantly had a thousand reasons that would inconvenience her, or upset our son or…I don’t know…something. “They go to the same school, they live in our neighborhood. It isn’t even out of her way. Call her.” And he was right of course, this wonderful neighbor had already offered many times to drive our son to school, why hadn’t I already called her? Maybe I didn’t want to be a bother, maybe I was like a toddler and wanted to “do it MYSELF!”